Moonspear call on me, call me

all welcome! tags for reference; early on the fifth. 

 

Hydra lingered at the borders of Moonspear, patrolling still. She was uncertain of her mates success in finding @Dragomir, though would range in the Glen later to inspect any evidence of his being there now, or passing through. The event of that day had lasted a while longer where his trail in the Glen became interrupted by several over things where she could not discern where it was he went. And with all that was going on, and her own potential condition, she could not put Moonspear further at risk. She wanted to seek him out, wanted to continue her search... but she had resigned herself to continuing another day. And after speaking with Dirge, she thought that perhaps he had simply gone to cool his head. Wish though she might that he would do so here, he had not. Like it or not, that was the way it was. 

She had plenty to be grateful for here though. For all that had gone wrong, there was still plenty right. Hydra crooned a note for any of the pack that might wish to join her on her patrol, and could not help but hope any of her sons (that could) might walk with her if they were not busy elsewhere on the mountain. @Atlas @Antares and @Osiris were each on her mind, and @Vega too; she wondered if they might wish for some space too, and would give them that for as long as they needed. Or perhaps they might think she needed space. For them, she would always have time. Hydra also thought of @Moriko and @Kukutux. The latter of which she was thankful for, and who would soon, if fortune turned, be bearing children as well. @Yama the matriarch thought of too; how was she faring, with Arcturus leaving as he had? Hydra knew @Opalia sought @Azreina, which Hydra had tried to do herself too. 

But she wondered how long she ought to search for those that simply did not wish to be here. Azreina was no doubt wounded for the loss of Dacio, but to leave all else behind... it seemed foolish. Hydra could not remember being so young and foolish, though no doubt she had been in pursuit of what she thought was best for herself. Hydra hoped Opalia would find her so that they could work toward preparing for what was to come. First, though, to recover from this blow dealt from within.

kukutux had come to know she was with child.

perturbed that she was a midwife and still had not seen the signs, kukutux had not been able to dwell upon it for long. the spirit she had swallowed was violent, and thrashed vomit into her throat as it fought with the essence of the little ones within. tooteega received long prayers, but more often than not, the waterbird confined herself to the densite for fitful snatches of sleep.

wearied, she desperately sought the patch of mint she knew grew upon the borders. the clean taste filled her with relief, and she went for a drink, to wash the acid tang of bile from her mouth and smooth the bedraggled fur of her chest. springjade eyes beheld the powerful shadow of hydra moving through the weald. the leader would deliver children before her, and yet the blackbear walked with the same confidence.

eventually kukutux came into view; she straightened with the air of a woman wiping nervous hands upon an apron. "hydra," the duck greeted, dipping her head as a respectful sigh tightened the gentle new curve to her flanks, hardly visible save to eyes that searched for it.

The matriarch turned to look at who was near, her eyes alight upon the form. The change in Kukutux figure was subtle enough where Hydra did not immediately take note, but the scent informed Hydra that something had changed. Hydra's own scent was changing, though the stress of all the events that had come to pass had her miss what signs had presented themselves. She had the good fortune of having a relatively easy pregnancy thus far, all things considered. No sickness, yet... only heightened moods that made her marginally more emotional and excitable than usual. 

Her own stomach had not rounded in such a way yet; the weight she was beginning to put on would be accentuated only in the concluding days of her pregnancy. Her belly would drop, though other than that visually there would likely be little indication of her status... ah, with the exception of her teats which would no doubt come to betray her as the day came nearer and nearer. 

Hydra's tail waved to think of what the change in Kukutux might be. That she might share this moment with a woman she trusted, and adored. Kukutux, Hydra breathed, and indeed her eyes searched. Her gaze shifted to the jade of her subordinates for confirmation. She could only guess, given she was no healer.

kukutux' own eyes searched quietly for any sign of motherhood blossoming in hydra. but her leader — and now her relative — did not seem to wear it. of course, the sable woman had carried young before. perhaps it is different every time. 

her throat bobbed with a swallow, and a shy smile broke beneath the momentary keen of her gaze. "i think ... i think you will be ajakuluk this year," the duck revealed. "family to your brother's children." she did not know the word, and hoped in the interim that hydra would volunteer it. 

a very proud thought occurred to kukutux as she waited for the stormcloud's response. arcturus had left, and would perhaps sire children with that woman who had followed. unless, of course, she was the one would could not conceive. and unless revui took a wife, his children would not be connected to moonspear either.

she ignored what the feral brother had said about her own babes to realize that jarilo's line would be next upon the mountain. ostregas bound to the stone and bound to blood of hydra.

and she carried that important lineage now.

The words brought forth from Kukutux were likely the only ones that truly could permit Hydra to see what there was left to gain in this world, in comparison to what had so recently been lost—

Everything. Still, everything! She would become an aunt for the first time, and her heart and soul felt the thrill of such wonderful news. Hydra had always wondered if this day would ever come, and here it was. She would not let the fact that the brother that abandoned them would not be here for it, nor know them as she and the others would, get to her any longer. 

And so she did what she could to release it to the wind as she exhaled, stepping toward Kukutux with a waving tail. I am so glad to hear this, she breathed, moving to nose Kukutux and lean into her as though to physically show she would ever be there to support her, and act as a pillar of strength if ever she needed it. An aunt, Hydra translated for Kukutux's benefit, ears pricking. She had never been an aunt before! Not to children she had met in any case; Towhee had cubs, adopted but she was still an aunt for it she felt, and this pivotal first was groundbreaking in that she would meet these ones... sooner, rather than later! 

Hydra beamed. Our cubs will play together upon this mountain, she drawled. Inheritors of this Wilderness, their lot. Strong-blooded, wonderful beings that she would love with all of her. Hydra looked Kukutux over, eyes warm in their fretful assessment. Kukutux was as a younger sister to her, especially now. How are you feeling? She asked, invested in the ducks wellbeing.

it was a beautiful image that hydra provided, though its crystalline surface was marred by the words of revui that echoed constantly within her mind. yet kukutux said none of this, setting aside the word aunt for future use. it was a sisterly look the blackbear gave the duck now, and it caused a familial glow to creep into her heart and crouch there.

"i have been sick, but i think it will go away soon," the girl answered with a small smile. "i have been looking at new plants and i have tried to learn their names," kukutux went on, wishing to detail her new goings-on as well as disclaim that she had indeed kept herself busy in the earning of her rank. 

"jarilo tells me that such knowledge of healing green things is known to your family?"

Hydra thought on her last pregnancy. I felt such illness during my time, a year ago; it did come to pass, she revealed. Kukutux explained what she had been doing as of late, and her tail waved. Hydra grinned to the inquiry and drawled, it is Lyra that knows of the plants by name, sight, and scent. I am like you; I thought it wise to learn of some herbs for their uses, in case I was ever in need and had no one to aid me. No, she ammended, considering, more like Lyra forced me to learn them, she said with a laugh. Her protective, fierce, cold-hearted sister would not rest until Hydra did know how to help herself and her physical hurts. 

So, to answer the question better, Lyra is best suited to guide you when it comes to this, though I cannot say she is much of a teacher, she drawled, wondering at that. Her lessons with her own cubs truly showed the thin thread of her twins patience... extended, likely, only because the children were a part of them all for being hers. But Kukutux was family now, in pack and in name too... Lyra would likely afford her the same, even if it was not much. I only know scent and use, and that is not for very many, she admitted. Enough, but Hydra could hardly call herself a medicine woman.

it was a contentment to kukutux that hydra thought so greatly of her, enough to look over the younger woman in her first time. it would be important to the well-being of the duck's children that they be brought up so readily. and yet she still felt very much outside the fringes of the inner family. but that was the way of things. they had been born here, she elsewhere.

kukutux then, would accept her lot. she did not need many things to subsist, and already the ostrega family had given her so much. a home. a name. and now children. a smile arrived on the duck's demure face. "she has met with me once," the waterbird revealed. and had scolded her like a toddling babe, but that was aside from the point.

"what does moonspear need that it does not have?" she inquired then, cryptic in a fit of confidence.

Kukutux inquiry was met with thoughtful silence, to start. For the first thought that occurred to her was, my brother. She steeled herself against that thought though; it helped no one to think it, and even to know it. Truth be told, I feel as though we have mostly everything that we need. Guardians, hunters, healers, she drawled, gaze shifting to Kukutux, wolves that look out for one another. I feel grateful for what we do have here, she drawled, that I have not thought much on what we do not. I suppose I will need to think on that question a little while longer, she admitted with a wan grin. 

For Arcturus was still on her mind. The matriarch sighed. If Kukutux was family, than she ought to reveal what was on her mind. I still ache for what I lost, though, she admitted. I thought to go and find him, but I am too far along to risk what I will soon bring. And more than that... when I tried to speak with him, he turned his back on me, she shook her head. He had come here to strike her down, too. I do not know what to think. Only now what he truly thinks of me, she murmured, licking her chops and gazing at the horizon. I also know he did not paint that picture of me by himself. Hydra thought of Wraen, the wolf he had come with. Hydra did not know how she had done it, only that she must have played a part for being there. There was no other reason, otherwise, she would risk her own life in such a way. 

Hydra would, some day, find a way to make her regret it. Her knife would be far slower, and hers would hit the heart true.

she nodded at hydra's appraisal of the skills within moonspear. she herself had begun to move toward the makings of extra leather-strips she might distribute, but her true calling oft led her to the lower slopes where ferns and low shrubs hid herbs from view.

there to her delight she had also found eggs, and the recollection of their rich innards tantalized the young woman even now.

but her mind attended the words of her leader, and the familiar melancholy that had stolen over the mountain since the two had been gone now found its way back into her heart. "perhaps love can turn the head of a wise wolf," she mused aloud, tones quiet out of respect for the grief that perhaps hovered in hydra's voice.

Hydra listened to Kukutux with an ache in her heart. She knew the truth in her heart, and she could deny it no more. I believe you were right. You think he loved her? she inquired with rapt interest, a coy little smile toying at the edge of her lips. It was a nice thought. Better than utter betrayal, at least. What makes you think so? she invited openly, tail swaying behind her with a step in her direction. 

Would that not be nice? And better than what Hydra was faced with? Less stress, to be sure, to think that Arcturus was there and in love rather than plotting her death. Knowing him, it was still hard to be certain when he had done something so completely out of left field to her. Unlike him, to every degree.

kuktutux found herself the focus of hydra's coolwater attention, and thought back to the one thing arcturus had ever given her. it was the day he had asked for green things to renew the womb of a woman he called his friend. companion.

and so much since had gone on, and he had hurt not only kuktutux, but those around her. and now hydra, whom she feared as a leader but who had only ever built the duck forward — the moongirl glanced up into the dark features a sparse moment.

why should she have loyalty to one who had not only left, but brought a stranger among them? kukutux took a breath, springjade eyes closing a moment. "i do not think she would have come with him here if she was not in his heart."

Hydra considered, and licked her chops. Perhaps you are right there. Has he said anything else to you on the topic of her...? Or any she-wolf, she drawled. Because perhaps it was not Wraen; perhaps it had been another wrapped into this that she had not even begun to consider. It would be a shame to bring back things that were meant to be bygones. She was not one to do so, but she had plenty of reason (within her own mind, naturally) to dislike the woman. Her coming here was for no other reason than to continue to spin the story, she imagined. Even when Hydra begged for her brother to speak with her, Hydra awaited the day she heard of her nefarious intent upon Arcturus returning to her. A hurt look passed her features. He never spoke to me on such things. He hid much from me, it seems, she shook her head. Never would she understand why. For all of his life, Hydra had never struck him true. They had sparred, and spoke, and argued... and perhaps he did not share some things for discomfort, but... but why? Truly, why? She had thought them closer than that...

Her heart stung, and her eyes cast downward. She swallowed the tears that might spring to her own eyes. How wrong she had been. But at least he had someone to speak with like Kukutux; she was good, all around. As Hydra looked to her, she wondered how Wraen might misconstrue her own character. Was there a way?

she wished now that she had not said a word, for hydra purled her way. should she keep from the blackbear what arcturus had said? caught betwixt loyalty to her tuku or the dark cloud who had left them, she shook her head.

her loyalty then would be to the barren woman. if she and wraen were indeed the same, then arcturus' line would plague hydra none at all. "i only thought of it because she came here." to moonspear, to this savage, wondrous, cold place. his sister now, plagued by a grief that kukutux had never seen upon the darkened features. "jarilo tells me the spirits of your mother and your father linger," the duck murmured, moving closer to buoy her newfound sister with a gentle nudge. "perhaps arcturus found their gaze too much." only one of them, after all, could truly rule, it seemed.

Hydra felt strangely unsatisfied by the answer, and wondered if there was more... but elected to trust in Kukutux, and that she had spoken true. It was not as though what she had said did not make sense after all, and so despite the desire to press Hydra determined that there was little point to that. What would Kukutux hide, after all? She would not be guessing at anything if she knew, and that was what the both of them had been doing. 

She was wistful as she drawled, I hope it is for love, rather than hate. Hate for me, hate for here, and shook her head. Even despite detesting the Firebird Sovereign, she hoped that Arcturus truly could see beyond the veil she had placed over his eyes someday. The illusion she had cast was a farce; Moonspear was indeed a colder and quieter place than most, but their love for one another was no less true for that. 

As Kukutux spoke of spirits, and the gaze of her late mother and father, Hydra's gaze traced the others features. No doubt Jarilo's spirituality was from their mother; Amekaze had shared with the two of them the essence of it in nature. But as for the afterlife itself? What was here was here, and what was gone was gone. Do what you must in this life, if you do not you will never have the opportunity to. Hydra did not think her brother was imaginative enough to sense his mother or his father here, although what did she know? In a matter of seconds, he had revealed to her he knew not a thing about her, after all. So she could not discredit that option Kukutux presented to her. 

I do not know that I will ever know. Not any time soon, at least. I cannot travel like this, and even afterward—he turned his back upon us, her gaze drifted to the earth, then to Kukutux as she murmured, upon me. For she did not think he truly blamed Moonspear for the sum of his heartache, just that they aligned with her. His pride dictated that the lash of his tongue fall upon each of their backs... though she thought that unfair. 

Somehow, those within her ranks for lesser a time than her brother knew her better than he. Hydra did not think Dragomir had left for his lack of belief in her, after all; she understood that now and then, family dispersed. The timing was painful for the sting of losing another she loved, but Hydra could not dwell on that. 

What was most important was this, the woman beside her—the wolves that would ever remain. Kukutux, she murmured, moving to nose the ducks cheek if allowed, thank you, she breathed, withdrawing... For her belief in her; for knowing better that she was not a monster; for helping her brothers, each of them; for a dozen things more. Know that I would not prohibit Arcturus from seeing your children, if that was your wish. He is family still. He behaved like a fool, and perhaps is a fool, time would tell the truth of it, as it always did, but that day... it is not the measure of who he is as a man. Hydra could not believe that. Here for years, by her side for so long. He was more. He had to be. I do not know what has caused that lapse of judgment, be it love, or hate... let it not be hate, so she herself would not need to keep him from where he truly belonged!, if he has any love for us, for his family here... he will make it known. 

He would return. To her. Perhaps not for good, but he would. Apologize, in their way, for his mistake. This was what she held onto, for now.

hydra was a multi-faceted individual who kukutux was not sure she would ever understand. as the moments went on, she wondered desperately if she should speak of wraen's condition. but would it matter? the knife-slash that arcturus had dealt his family was grave and enormous. the wound revui too had left would not be easily mended.

briefly uncomfortable as the blackbear's focus returned to her, the duck willed herself not to fidget, and nodded instead. arcturus would be blood-family to the children she carried. his violence had not been toward her, and so she would not fear the kisuk. however, it was a reassurance to know that hydra would not hold such notions against her.

there were few words of comfort kukutux might offer, only the brush of her shoulder, the flattening of her pale ears. to be a leader meant a great ice-stone to be carried always in one's heart, and the duck was unsure how to assuage that. hydra's kiss burned a moment upon her pale cheek; it had been a long while since a woman had touched her, even in familial affection.

agana.

a low sigh. "i will pray that he returns. the gods reward a just heart, my sister," kukutux breathed with more determination than she had felt in a long while. "you have that here. moonspear is a great gift and you have tended it. let the light of it bring arcturus home." have faith in the spirits of the sky and the moon to tempt him back.

Hydra listened to her sister in love, and her ears flicked as did so. If there were gods, Hydra thought that Kukutux must be right... how could she be wrong? Arcturus had been unjust, to her, to his family. To the old, to the present, and what was to come. Was her own heart just? Yes, she told herself, and she needed no convincing of it. All that she had done, and all that she would ever do, was for those that she loved. 

She hummed toward Kukutux and her final sentiment. The matriarch disagreed, but did not say so then. Hydra thought that her brother had decided to place himself in its (Moonspears) shadow, as though he had been cast out, or mistreated. The matriarch imagined that his shame from that would keep him from returning home again. As to that, she did not know how she felt. Let him burn hot with that shame on the one hand... but, could she truly live the rest of her lifetime without him, on the other?

He had decided for her that she might need to. A sobering reality. One that caused her, on her angrier days, to linger longer on the former thought than the latter. He had betrayed her family, after all, on turning his back upon those that needed him while she was growing heavy with child. For love, or for otherwise, Hydra damned the faulty reason (which surely could not be she herself). It would rue the day. 

Hydra began to move, slowly, but this time in thoughtful silence; she invited Kukutux along with a gesture, thinking the walk and the quiet might do them both some good if the duck felt so inclined to move with her. 

last from me, here <3 gonna start us another during the cougar threead!